How to say goodbye?

Ryanne's great-grandfather passed away this morning. We got the call while we were out for lunch.

I don't know how to explain it to Ryanne. I asked her today if she remembered him and she does. I told her that we wouldn't see him again. I told her that he had died - she knows the word, but doesn't grasp the permanence, yet. I told her he would be in our memories, but we wouldn't be able to see him anymore. I suspect quite a bit more explanation will be required in the coming months, but maybe not.

I don't know whether she'll ask. I don't know how much to prompt her. I was about her age when my grandfather died and I remember that. I remember not being allowed to go to the funeral, and not understanding why. I intend to follow her lead as far as her attendance at any memorial things that are held.

I do intend to let her listen to him tell her about Rover tomorrow. She'll always have that. Maybe that will help start our conversation.

Mine Mine

Last week, Chrys and I were playing around with Ryanne. She was hollering that something was hers and we started saying, "Mine Mine" (a la the albatrosses from Nemo). She suddenly got very upset.

R: "Not yours." she says to me
M: "Mine"
R: "I'm mommy's AND daddy's!"

Poor baby thought we were arguing over who she belonged to. We quickly assured her that she was both of ours and the crying was over.

Menstruating

Ryanne is obsessed with my cycles. I remember being very intrigued by the process as a young child, as well, but not quite to the extent that she is. She constantly asks about my pads and if she's going to bleed on certain days, etc.

The most interesting, though, is when we find her panties stuffed full of toilet paper. She says it's "in case she bleeds" and will seek out the wad, should she lose it at potty time to diligently replace it in her panties until bed time.

This is one of those where I'm hoping some of the genes from Chrys' side get in and put off the onset of puberty, but I'm not terribly optimistic.

The Prestige

If you haven't seen this movie, I'm going to fill this with spoilers so consider yourself warned.

It's apparently time to begin limiting what RC sees. She's starting to process more and more of what she sees on TV and is deeply impacted by things.

Last week, we watched The Prestige when we were at Aunt Kity's house for dinner. It was disturbing to me. Chrys says it's because I saw it through her eyes.

The first point came with Angier's wife was stuck in the water. She was panicking and Ryanne commented that she was yelling for help, but no one could hear her. I think she assumed that because no one could hear her, they didn't know to help her. I tried to explain that they were trying to help her, but couldn't get the glass broken fast enough. She looked at me when Angier bent to check on her and asked "What happened to his (mommy's real first name)?" Chrys and I suspect that she thinks my first name is just another title for my status to Chrys. It's an interesting conclusion.

From there, she had other issues. There was the Tesla machine that creeped her out because it was electricity and she didn't understand what it was doing - she thought it was hurting him. She picked up on the fact that it was bad, though. She didn't like seeing the tanks of men. She didn't like the bird killing. She didn't like the sad music. Etc.

It's just time to stop letting her be in the room for stuff like that. She's no longer just in the room, but really trying to process what's going on and it's deeply affecting her.

Spelling and reading

The other day, Ryanne asked me to write my name for her to trace it. She handed me the pen and paper, "Write mommy like m-o-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m." When did she pick that up?

I picked up a copy of this book to start teaching her to read. She's shown a lot of interest in sounds and letters and pretends to read stuff all the time. I figured she was almost ready. The first lesson is sounding out "m" and "s". We did that and the next day she was pointing to them on signs and telling me she saw "mmmmmm"s and "ssssss"s. That was fast.

The next part of the lesson is learning to take words that are slow or fast and speed them up or slow them down. The example in the book for slow word is "motor (pause) boat". She's instructed to say it fast.

M: "Motor (pause) boat" Now you say it fast.
R: "Fast."
M: "No, you say motor (pause) boat fast"
R: "Motorboat fast"
M: "Leave off the fast and just say motorboat without pausing like mommy does."
R: "Motorboat faster"

This went on for quite some time. Chrys almost hurt himself laughing. She just didn't get the game and the explanation in the book wasn't helping. She got the repeating and then was having a hard time with the instruction instead of repeating the words used. There was a second round of these games.

M: I'm going to say a word and then you say it fast. "Mmmmmmmeeeeeee"
R: "Yyyyyyooooouuuuuu fast"

You get where this is going. Oy the frustration. I gave up on the lesson after 10 minutes or so. Maybe we'll try again next week.