Lullabies

I ran into you drinking a glass of water in the bathroom. You said you were having trouble falling asleep. I jokingly asked if You needed me to come sing you a lullaby. There was a quiet, “yes”.

Once in your room, you said you had Mr. Rogers theme song stuck In your head. I sang that. And You Are My Sunshine. And Skidamarink. Your body relaxed.

I asked if that was good and got a sleepy, “uh huh”.

My heart is full tonight, sweet one. I love you.

14 Christmases

That's how long we made it before an Amazon notification on my phone for a present she got from Santa today confirmed her hunch. Not a bad run. I explained that nothing would change, but that she now got to help look out for ways to make Christmas magical for other people. She seemed ok with that, but a little sad to have the confirmation for herself.

Getting old

We had ice cream for dinner tonight. Turns out, it was too much sweet so you ate a chicken pattie instead. When dad asked what you wanted with it, you got excited about bread. When pushed for anything else, you requested...a tomato. 

"Do you think we have any tomatoes around here?"

Then you gestured at your head, "Who am I kidding? Of course we have tomatoes!"

There are about 10 pounds of them sitting on the counter. Fresh, from the garden. 

Given the choice between ice cream sundaes and chicken patties on bread with a tomato. I guess this shouldn't surprise me for the girl who once picked spinach over tater tots. I love you, kid. 

If wishes were horses

She ponders...I start to explain and she declares that she gets it. 

"Beggars have lots of wishes so if wishes were horses then beggars would have lots of horses to ride."

Yeah pretty much...

"And then the beggars could sell some of their horses and get money to get other things."

Annnnnnddddd not so much. 

Growing up

We've had lots of changes lately.

You got hit in the chest during gym last year. It made a knot. It went away. When you noticed it again, you were really upset because nothing had happened to cause it. Then we noticed it was on both sides. You cried in my lap for the longest time about how you weren't ready. Neither am I, sweet girl.

A couple of weeks ago, you ditched your booster in my car. You were tired of hitting your head on the roof of the car. The belt fits you with nothing under you.

You start middle school tomorrow (well, later today). I'm not ready. You haven't wanted to talk about it. You don't want to grow up. I don't want you to, either.

At the same time, I marvel at the person you are. You are witty, confident (with just the right amount of self-deprecating humor to balance it out). You are kind. You are loving. You still love to cuddle. You love Minecraft, and green, and Tinkerbell.

You are growing, and aren't. You're 'tween. And all of the reasons we call it that become clearer to me as we stay in this middling period. 

So many things and the thing I want you to remember most, always, is that I love you.